You do everything you can as parents to keep your
home comfortable, secure and loving. But - Is your home a fun place for
your family to be? Is there enough frivolity around your house? Especially
laughter that you have initiated or are at the center of?
What do you want your children and grandchildren
to remember about you? Certainly good character and the like, but it's also
important that laughter be right up there at the top of the list. Along
with your other strengths - you might hope that one day your kids will say,
"You know, growing up in my family was a lot of fun!"
But there are more payoffs to having fun as a family
than just fuzzy memories.
Why do you think that royal courts had professional
jesters? Like King Solomon, crowned heads were often over-burdened with
matters of state and they knew that laughter relieved the burden and was
good medicine. Jesters were a valued commodity.
We need to take a lesson from those long ago monarchs
by taking better advantage of the healing powers of laughter. Everyday burdens
of work and difficulties of life can be frustrating, but we will be passing
a valuable lesson to our children if we can teach them that frustrations
can
often be handled better if we use humor as a coping tool.
Humor gives a new perspective. Humor involves change in outlook.
We can step outside ourselves for at least a moment and see our circumstances
more objectively. When our own little flaws and inconsistencies are the
subject of a joke - the result can also be humbling. Parents are often afraid
to admit their frailties to their children because we don't want to loose
respect. But the opposite usually happens. Children almost always admire
the honesty and humility a person shows when they exhibit the ability to
take a joke about their own shortcomings. The next time someone catches
you in a silly mood or behavior, DO IT - Laugh at yourself!
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| Kristen and Kayla enjoy making friends laugh. |
These guys like to make friends laugh too! |
Help your kids overcome discouragement. When your child comes
home after a horrible day, or a distressing exam, a round of witty remarks,
tickles or funny stories can restore some balance to the day. Even in crisis
or extremely emotional situations, a laugh at just the right time can bring
healing relief. Doctors have long known that laughter counteracts the physiological
effects of stress and even some illnesses. You can even use humor to lighten
the load of family chores.
Actually teaching your kids something. Humor can actually be an
aid in teaching your children. If you have teens, a story or anecdote from
your own youth will often get the point across much better than a lecture.
A dry sermon on the same subject will fall on deaf ears.
A tool to defuse anger. Psychologists say that you can actually
prevent feelings of anger or vengeance with hearty laughter. Who hasn't
experienced trying to punish a child for doing something so crazy that you
had to break down and laugh?
Turn this quality of humor to your advantage when tension seems
high around the house. A silly face, or funny comment can cleanse the air,
soothe tempers, or re-establish rapport after someone has had to be corrected.
Humor breaks barriers.
Build bridges. You can often break the ice with your children's
friends by using humor. It is also an effective way to re-connect with a
child who may seem distant emotionally.
Just have fun. Good times together as a family are reason enough
for parents to cultivate a sense of humor about the family. Sharing laughter
can deepen the family's feelings of unity; and "inside jokes"
or common memories of funny occurrences enjoyed together will strengthen
the sense of family identity.
Okay - So give us some hints.
- Catch yourself being inconsistent - and then Laugh at yourself. Here
is the foundation of a healthy sense of humor.
- Make notice of the inappropriate or silly things people say in public.
Draw parallels between those silly behaviors and your own. Humor does not
have to be criticism - only acceptance of the fact that we are imperfect
beings.
- Read funny things, like the comic strips, collections of wit and humor,
humor columnists and stories by those with well developed senses of humor
(Erma Bombeck or Mark Twain for example.
- Do something absolutely absurd from time to time - something totally
out of character for
you. The spontaneity will absolutely entertain and loosen you up as well!
- Do avoid sarcasm, excessive teasing and ridicule. These are rarely
funny. They usually hurt rather than heal. (The Romans used excessive tickling
as a form of punishment. Let's not go there.
So come on. "Lighten up" as the kids say. And if laughter
isn't one of the main weapons in your arsenal to keep your family happy,
Don't Wait Start now and fill the prescription - laughter is good
family medicine. |